Welcome to "Un Slut," a column about the toxic culture of bullying and slut shaming by Emily Lindin, founder of The Un Slut Project, director of "Un Slut: A Documentary Film," and author of "Un Slut: A Diary and a Memoir."We grow up learning that a woman’s sexuality must be carefully controlled by someone other than the woman herself.
It’s one of the reasons we’re still so uncomfortable acknowledging female masturbation. But your sexuality is not one of those things, and it’s time to stop acting like it is.
Having sex is fine, as long as you don't talk about it beforehand.
But understanding this concept is one thing – putting it into practice is another.
Since the difference between a 16- or 17-year-old and an 18-year-old may be difficult to discern, someone keen to avoid a felony charge would be wise to demand proof of age before saying anything about sex.
And if the object of his attention happens to have a fake ID—as teenagers pretending to be older than they are sometimes do, especially when they go to bars or clubs—that is no defense.
It’s possible that your power might be forcibly taken away from you in the form of sexual assault.
If that happens or has happened to you already, it’s important to recognize that you bear no responsibility for that crime.
It’s a balmy night in Manhattan’s financial district, and at a sports bar called Stout, everyone is Tindering.