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“My roommates are pigs.” “I never have time to clean it up.” “Your place is so much nicer.It doesn’t make sense to go to mine.” After some period of time you’ve GOT to see his space.You may get lots of texts, because those can be sent easily no matter what the situation, but real human interaction is tough to spare.Does he have a load of reasons why you can’t go to his place?The talk always begins the same way then dives off in one of two directions. ” is the question I ask — the logical question to ask — when a male friend describes a woman he’s been seeing regularly and exclusively. Sometimes he says, “I don’t know.” It’s as though relationships are the same as good weather, something that just happens to you.Is being exclusive the same as being someone’s significant other? Old me would have said yes too, but now I think I’m changing camps.What makes this harder to navigate is the fact that people interpret social relationships so differently.

A boyfriend girlfriend might just complicate things a bit.We’re trained to assume that relationships happen in five stages: initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, and bonding.Developed by Mark Knapp, the Relational Development Model (also aptly known as “Knapp’s Theory”) is the sort of theory that you know about without actually knowing about.I no longer thinks it’s possible to accidentally end up in a relationship.You can back into one, sure, but it isn’t anything until it has a name.It’s hard to really know a person without seeing where they live, so if he’s giving you the stiff arm about a visit to his home, chances are something’s amiss.

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